Grumpy

Friday, January 21, 2011
I am not usually grumpy on the blog (but I can be sometimes in real life:). I know that our life is a good and blessed one but it is not always sunshine and roses in the peanut house. There are a few (pretty insignificant) things that are making me grumpy this week so just to keep it real here I thought I'd share...

~I despise when someone is having a really hard time and someone tells them "this too shall pass."  This is a HUGE pet peeve of mine.  I know that sometimes we don't know what to say to someone when they are sad or grieving.  I have had several friends suffer loss in the last few weeks and I get stuck for something to say too. But please don't say..."this too shall pass." From a counseling/empathic listening perspective it is the WORST thing you can say to someone.  You are basically saying...How you feel right now is really unimportant!  Yes, we ALL know that feelings and situations are temporary and things will usually get better.  But when someone is in pain they need empathy.  They need to know that what they are feeling is legitimate and real and that you understand that.  So, please don't ever tell me "this too shall pass."  It will only make me feel worse.

~Three or four months ago I paid for a service on-line (might share more specifics later) and the person has never done the work. They had excuse after excuse after excuse and I was gracious and understanding for a long time.  I am trying to file a dispute but I am so frustrated that I might be out $200 because of dishonesty in this little blog world.  It makes me very sad.  I so hope this resolves in the right way.

~I am so exhausted.  In November and December I was feeling really good.  It seemed that my adrenals and my thyroid were at good levels and I almost had the energy of a normal person for the first time in a very LONG time (years, really).  But ever since the stress and injuries of the car accident, I am just really, really tired.  I am guessing that my adrenal levels have fallen again (and I am going to have them checked soon).  I just hate that I have regressed when I was doing so well.

~ Someone in Bulgaria was trying to use our debit card last week so our bank froze our account for a few days (without explanation).  I am glad they caught it but is was awful getting declined at the grocery  store and a few other places and not knowing why. Again, dishonest people make me sad.

This is just plain cute.... we got this catalog from Cambia Cove in the mail and Kate is obsessed with these Valentine chocolates....she dreams about them, talks about them, looks at the catalog over and over.  Kate clearly has expensive taste! She asked me if Valentine's Day is that holiday with the bunny:)

My creation

It is cold here (for SE Texas anyway---not MN cold!) and I love soup when it is cold. 
 I am going to post a good soup recipe tonight or tomorrow morning:)


Have a good weekend.  Stay warm:)

30 comments:

  1. Kate is a girl after my own heart!!

    I'm sorry that you are not feeling well, I suffer with thyroid problems and it's not fun.

    I have been so leary about having a custom blog design done for the very reason you said, I'm afraid I'll lose money.

    I hope you have a great weekend :)

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  2. Oh, so true. I hate when people pull out the old "this too shall pass." It's kind of the equivalent of saying, "Well, EVERYBODY has problems..." Not helpful! Just a good old fashioned, "I'm so sorry" will do!

    And, oh, I am going to be dreaming about those chocolates tonight just like Kate!

    Hope you feel better soon - and that you get the remedy you're hoping for in your online dispute. Dishonest people make me sad, too.

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  3. I'm sorry that you are in a "funk". I am too. We had someone use our credit card in nightclubs all over Paris. Let me tell you while"they " were out whooping it up I was paying the price here. To not have access to my card for two weeks was stressful, and embarrassing (fabric store declined card ,before bank notified me) . I will keep you in my prayers. HUGS

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  4. I'm so sorry you're feeling poorly Kim. Good health is so important, isn't it? Car accidents can bring up old illness/injuries so easily and it knocks us sideways, because we seemed to walk away from the accident injury-free. I hope you get better very soon.

    *I* love the look of those chocolates too!! Kate does have good taste!!!!!
    Best
    Snick :)

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  5. Who wouldn't be obsessed with those chocolates?

    The waiter at a place in DC never game me back my credit card, I didn't even realize until I got home and there were 2 charges to a gas station and one to Wendys. Pretty easy to figure out since I don't have a car or eat fast food!

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  6. I have been feeling kind of grumpy myself. I hope you feel better soon. I think January can be a rough month for many of us. I love your blog and have been reading for some time. Your post about Kate being four really touched me not only because my youngest just turned five but because I have a daughter who will be 10 in March. I love and adore the young lady she is becoming but I miss the little girl she was so much my heart hurts. She is entering the difficult years when girls aren't always nice to each other and her body is starting to go through changes and I just want to hold her close. I remember how difficult those years can be. Please know that I am inspired by you and it is a joy in my day to read about you and your sweet family. And I appreciate you telling us that you are grumpy because sometimes we are too! I was in a car accident when I was pregnant with my daughter and it took me quite a while to feel fully recovered physically and emotionally. I am praying for you and hope you feel better soon.

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  7. I am sorry you are feeling blah. It just plain stinks!! (And believe me... I've been there too!) It's so scary how many people's accounts have been messed with! My friend Suzanne just yesterday was all upset b/c her bank contacted her to tell her all her accounts were frozen b/c someone was trying to use her card. Anyway, I will certainly keep you and your sweet family in my prayers!! Wishing you a happy and restful weekend!! Brooke

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  8. In the past several years there have been several things that have happened to me that have made me realize what NOT to say to someone!! 'This too shall pass' does not help and neither does 'have faith'. And please don't 'one up' the person in need/trouble. That doesn't help either.
    I am sorry your aren't feeling well. I imagine the cold weather isn't helping. But soup might! :)

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  9. Well, I would have to say that those chocolates are dreamy!
    I love soup too on a cold day :)

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  10. I never comment, but just experienced a huge loss recently and have been following your blog for awhile, since I may adopt someday! The other pet peeve catch phrase of mine is "if there is anything I can do," the only disclaimer is that I an fine with the handful of REALLY close family and friends saying it and meaning it, but the random acquaintances I haven't heard from in years? In my grumpiest moments, I want to say "why yes, there is something you can do! Bring him (my fiancé) back, please! Thank you much!" I hope you are getting feeling better, since you don't know my slightly sarcastic humor, I will refrain from saying "this too shall pass!"

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  11. I also suffer with thyroid issues and some days it just feels like I'm in a fog. I'm grumpy, edgey and emotional. When that "fog" lifts, I feel renewed and more like "me again". Just know that we are human and we have "our days". We know this blog is just a snippet of your life and we appreciate you for honesty and transparency. Hoping the weekend is better and YES bundle up, it's cold here in SE TEXAS!!!!


    Now excuse me while I grab some cleanser for this monitor screen....yep the chocolates looked so good I had to lick the screen! HA!

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  12. I always feel grumpy this time of year. I think it is the lack of sunlight and warm weather! The littlest things tend to set me off.

    So sorry you are feeling so down right now, but you are right "This too shall pass" does not give you much comfort when you are working through something difficult.

    As for your your online service....or maybe I should say, lack of service. I hate to hear things like this. I hope whoever it is, makes it right with you and either gives you the service they promised or refunds your money!

    Maybe you should order a box of those chocolates.... I know if the UPS man showed up at my door with those, my frown would surely be turned upside down:)

    Hope you have a nice weekend Kim. Try to relax~

    xo,

    Lisa

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  13. Oh I have had that happen with my credit card while I was on vacation on a holiday weekend! I had NO cash for three days until I could find a branch of my bank in that state- thank goodness there was one. I am still annoyed that they didn't call me.

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  14. Oh Kim the non-validation thing is like nails on a chalkborad for me. Someone in my extended family has a very bad habit of it, and so I'm very careful about it myself.

    I have had adrenal issues in the past and so I know it's hard to function when they are way down.
    Give yourself lots of grace and rest. Hope you are better soon!
    Tamara

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  15. Sorry you're not feeling well. You know what bugs me is when you're (I mean me) telling someone how you feel and they interrupt and start saying how bad they feel! OY! I think Kate is on the right track with those chocolates! January is always a difficult month for me and even more so this year. Hope that you have a good weekend. Would love a good soup recipe!
    Janet

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  16. my friend, don't get me started.
    years ago,i honestly thought i should write a book on what-not-to-say when someone is going through a crisis. seriously.
    amen
    preach on

    major bummer with the online issue. so frustrating when someone treats you in a way you would never treat them.

    huge bummer on the debit card.ugh.

    i was just thinking today about a time in my life a few years ago when i was feeling mentally & physically just plain BAD> i hate feeling bad. i will be praying you are back to "100%kim" very soon.

    i think you're awesome by the way. totally awesome

    & ps...couple of our mutual friends have recently sung your praises too.
    you are loved
    x0

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  17. Kim: One of favorite things about you is how you handle everything with such class. I'm sad that you are feeling down and now may have been taken advantage of. I'm happy you know you can vent to us and know that you have support from virtual strangers but friends none the less. Praying for you and keeping you close to my heart.
    xoxo
    Nancy

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  18. oh boy Kim sorry you are not up to par right now.

    Lea
    xo

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  19. All I can say is that I am so sorry and that it must really stink feeling helpless to all of it. Hope that validated your feelings! LOL :) Seriously, I really am sorry, and I hope you always feel comfortable venting on your blog. I know I do sometimes and really is so therapeutic!... xox

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  20. Why does it seem to come in waves? Maybe so all the bad stuff can get delt with at once?

    Hope that the business dealings are straightened out soon but moreover that you discover an answer to get your health back to where you were.

    And of course agree with everyone else who thinks a beautiful box of chocolates might be just the thing. But don't wait on the bunny... get the cupid to bring it ;)

    Well wishes sent your way,
    Trena

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  21. I am sorry it's been a tough week. I struggle with thyroid issues, too. Up and down and up again. Ugh.

    And someone stole my husband's credit card number last week! Not the card, just the number. The police are involved and won't tell us anything, so we don't know who or where or anything. But the card company canceled the account and sent a new card this week. Dishonest people stink.

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  22. Oh Kim! I'm sorry for all that is making you sad, those times can be so tough. :(
    You are a GREAT mom/wife/friend and I do hope you're back to feeling at your best soon.
    I look forward to your soup recipe!
    xoxo

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  23. I'm so sorry you are having a rough time right now. Thinking of you and hoping you are feeling better soon.

    And Kate- she is a girl after my own heart. I will say that if she is more enthralled with the beauty of the chocolates - like the designs - I saw some at Target that were similar and - I'm sure- much cheaper. lol. Hope the bunny gives her all the Valentine chocolate a girl could eat.

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  24. I am very tired too and have been for months. I am thinking when Greg gets home from Texas I need to go to a doctor. I'm not any fun anymore as a Mommy because I am so tired. Praying for you to get your energy back sweet girl.

    As for that expression "this too shall pass"...I agree...it is a cold statement and literally blows off what that person is feeling. When my big kids went back home another missionary told me, "It gets easier to say goodbye". Really??? I hope not. I only get to see them once a year for now so I hope that the next time is not easier either! How could that be? Seriously.

    CHOCOLATE!!! Maybe that's what I need for energy!!!

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  25. I don't mind you keeping it real. In fact, it's one of the things that keeps me coming back!

    I'm so with you on that first one! I can't stand platitudes like that. Seriously, have they ever helped anyone?!

    I heart those hearts :)

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  26. The only time I say "this too shall pass" is to myself -- under my breath -- while my child is having yet another meltdown in public! It's the only time this phrase is acceptable!

    So sorry to hear about your online experience. I am currently have a similar experience on Etsy. I ordered a Halloween costume in August and it's never arrived and the gal refuses to refund my money, even after I have sent her two letters in the mail. It's making me crazy!

    Hope you are feeling better soon.

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  27. I like your blog. Nice to meet you.
    Thank you, thank you, Thank YOU!!! I cannot tell you how hurtful it is when people say "This too shall pass" or "God intended this for good." OUCH. With my son's diabetes, it shall NOT pass. It is forever. And on behalf of the diabetes "mom" community...thank you! People say a lot of hurtful (although they mean well) things to us. Not sometimes...like every week. So I am so happy you "get it."

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  28. January in Texas is like a month of rainy Mondays! It is hard not to be grumpy-affected by things when the weather is gloomier than we are used to having.

    I hope you have a much better week this week---and that you feel better very soon.

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  29. Kim, I have thyroid disease and seem to have more issues in January than any other time of the year. Here is a good article from a site that has given me a lot of helpful info on thyoid disease. Hope you feel better soon! http://thyroid.about.com/od/relatedconditions1/a/winterize.htm

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Thank you for your kindness.