Not on my "A" game here

Sunday, November 14, 2010
I have really been struggling here since we returned from our trip.  I just cannot get caught up on life.  One of the peanuts blatantly told me this weekend that he is not getting enough attention from me.  He is feeling a bit "unloved." That cut me to the core.  The only things I really want to do here on earth are serve God and be a good Mom and wife. It is so hard to get everything done.  Is there such a thing a balance for Moms?  I really feel like there are not enough hours in the day to make everyone happy.  Anyone else feel that way?  Now the holidays are upon us and I am going to try not to let stress get the best of me.  I have a few friends whose motto is "to blessed to be stressed."  I am going to try to remind myself of that.

We attempted Christmas Card photos this weekend...

HabuCC0008


Yeah, this photo about sums it all up!  I think we need to do another shoot.


I have a bunch of things to blog about this week.  I am so behind in recording our  family memories.  I am going to try to get my groove back.  Oh and the new dog still has no name.  We tried out Roscoe and Noble but they have not stuck.

41 comments:

  1. I truly understand what you are saying. Just today I had what could only be classified as a meltdown. I've been telling my husband I am so tired feeling like I fail at everything. I have so much on my plate that I only get to do enough to get by instead of really doing my best. I am a bit of a perfectionist so it really bothers me.

    I'll be saying a prayer for you to find some peace.

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  2. Different weeks present different challenges. I so get that. I find that I spend all my weekends doing chores, and I hate chores. But I try not to grumble about them, because after all, it does make for a nicer week with my kids. (we get clean clothes to wear and good food to eat, so there is that!).

    With number two coming home (in 2007) I learned to let some things go, and you know, it's totally okay with me. And my kids. Eventually, it gets to me, and I deal, but I find I'm a much happier and somewhat less stressed person if I let some things go. I work full time in an exhausting job, so maybe that's why it works for me, coz I'd never get any sleep if I kept things up to my former standards. Heh heh heh.

    Hang in there Kim, you'll get your groove back!
    Best,
    Snick :)
    dd Sunshine 9 1/2 VN
    dd Brilliance 4 1/2 China

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  3. O.K... so this is random considering your post, which I really relate to, but it occurs to me that your sweet new pooch needs a one syllable name to go with Scout. :) He looks like a Pete, George, or Beck to me.

    Have a blessed week!
    Suzanne

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  4. You are certainly not alone in your feelings. I sometimes have to just S.T.O.P., get on the floor and PLAY for awhile. It makes everyone happy even if it means the dishes stay in the sink for a night. :) On the name front, I really liked one person's suggestion when you first asked-that you have it come from To Kill a Mockingbird. So my vote is Harper. :)

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  5. Kim,

    Here are my most favorite dog names...Moxy, Harley, Tofu and Tribble. Moxy was the name of our beloved Pom who passed away recently after being with us for 17 years! How is that for longevity? I just thought a few dog names would give you a smile this evening:) Hang in there!

    Reneé in Wa.
    www.daughtersfromafar.blogspot.com

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  6. Hi Kim! That photo is so funny and cute. I love it! As you may or may not have noticed, I am too overwhelmed to even blog! (Which disappoints me, and I am trying to formulate a plan to start again) But I wanted to pop in and say hi, and also that I love catching up on your family! Your new dog is so cute! Our dog Tucker died last spring, and I am trying to convince my husband that it is time for a new puppy! I love the name Gus! I totally empathize with your feelings of just wanting to be a good Mother and Wife, and yet finding so little time to go around. It is frustrating! I try to be organized, but I so rarely have time to finish big projects (like closet cleaning or a special craft)! I do feel that I am always rushing. Hang on! And enjoy them... I know that you do, because they'll soon be married! Or in College! Time flies. I will say this... when they grow up and leave, you will remember their childhood as magical. I do, and it wasn't always that way. I guess mothers have selective memory! Take care Kim. I will try to get back into the blog world soon. Love, Erin

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  7. I feel like most days. Keep your chin up. Life will settle!

    Lea
    xo

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  8. I dont have kids yet... but i def know what it feels like to have life just take over. I hate that feeling of never catching up. Just breathe. Try and slow down...put priorities first and take it one day at a time!

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  9. I can definitely relate!

    ...Have you thought about the name "Bruce" for your new doggy?

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  10. Oh how I can relate...with 4 little ones 5 and under AND working full time I always feel like I am a step behind!!! I know the only way I can get through this constant struggle with time is through prayer...so that's what I do!

    Love the pic of Harry...I couldn't help but smile! :)

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  11. Sometimes the non-perfect photos are best!

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  12. Oh gosh -- I feel the same way!! Am thinking that when I wake up at 2 or 3 AM thinking of things that I need to do or have failed to do, I should just get up and get going. Hang in there -- hoping things get better. We Moms take on a lot. Sending good wishes your way!

    Janet
    How about Murphy or Broady for the dog's name? We like names ending in "Y!"

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  13. yes, i can relate! even though i'm not married and only have one kiddo...i get myself super stressed when things are "undone"!! and now it's holiday season and we all just add more things to do to our lists. anyway, i hope it calms down for you a bit!

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  14. I am SO with you. I can't seem to get my house clean. Laundry I am barely keeping up with. My bathrooms really need to be cleaned. Refrigerator needs to be cleaned out AND healthy food needs to be bought. Den papers need to be filed. I do have lots of Christmas shopping done, so that is good. Will need to start wrapping. Floors need a good scrubbing and definitely dusting- which I leave to absolutely last thing- is way behind schedule. I'd like to start getting out some Christmas decorations, but can't seem to find the time. I did pay bills this morning, as well as pick up the living room, unload the dishwasher and put another load of clothes in the dryer- before leaving for work at 7:00! Oh yes, I should be working right now.... :) There just aren't enough hours in the day!

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  15. :-)
    I think all moms feel this. Not all the time, but it definitely comes in waves. It's very hard to get everything done and be able to meet the needs of everyone in your house (including you). You are a GREAT mom!! I am sure that the new dog has added some excitement and chaos to your busy life. It's a moment...hang in there, it will pass. Kids don't always realize that clean clothes and food in the house are ways that they are loved too!

    Love you!!

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  16. I know how you feel my friend. Big hugs....it is so hard to be a Momma because we are torn in so many different directions and there really IS so much to be done. Praying for you to have a balanced day with your activities and your precious peanuts:)

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  17. How about Jem for the new puppy? LOVED "To Kill a Mockingbird"!
    -- Melissa

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  18. I TOTALLY understand what your talking about!! This should make you feel much better ... I'm still trying to get caught up from March. Once we brought our little boy home it seems like everything has taken a backseat ... editing pictures being the first thing that went out of control. You would be able to see that from my blog. I'm still posting summer pictures ... ugh! I still work FT & I have not been able to find a good balance just yet. If you find it ... please share your tips!!

    Take care & good luck with the family pictures!
    Robin

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  19. No....sigh...no balance here! I feel you sister. We have to do another shoot also for our card...thought I had it nailed this weekend, came home, looked at the pictures and was ummm let's just say, not pleased. It is a matter of keeping it all in perspective...and in prayer. You are a wonderful mama...don't forget that, even wonderful mamas have off days. WIshing for you a wonderful week!

    Love,
    Heather

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  20. Kim,
    I'm not on my A game right now either. Hugs to you! Let's try to extend grace to ourselves, so we can do the things you mentioned that are most important in our earthly life.
    It's going to be a busy time until the New Year, so I hope I will just embrace it and enjoy the season.
    That is an adorable photo btw! It made me smile!
    Tamara

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  21. "Too Blessed to be Stressed!" How come I have never heard that? Kim, I DO understand how you feel. I have not been on my A game in a very long time. Sometimes it is hard to feel like I deserve to do something I love, when everyone else needs me. I honestly don't know many Mom's that are as gifted as you are, in so many things.. You are a beautiful role model of a Godly mother and friend.. So, I am sorry one of the Peanuts was feeling like his piece of your pie was too small... But, perhaps he was not on his "A game" this weekend either!!! Daily I am reminded I will never completely have this Mom thing down!! But, I am thankful for Mom's like you who I can turn to for a listening ear and an amazing heart!

    Love ya,
    Di

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  22. Name the dog Chief to go with Scout...and tell us when you figure out the rest ;)

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  23. Don't feel "rained on"! I think we all have been at that point inour lives!! Just remember...it's gets back on track!

    On a lighter note! How about the name "Jasper" for the new pooch! Not to cutesy, with a flair souther touch to it!

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  24. Oh Kim. You know that I am "off my game" in the biggest way right now so I feel your pain.

    Give yourself a break. You're a great mom! That's why your kids want your attention.

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  25. I absolutely know what you mean. Some days I just want to sit and do nothing because there are so many thngs to do. I am having one of those months-where everything seems like it is not getting done...I haven't taken our photos yet and I feel very stressed over this too.
    Lisa

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  26. I can completely relate to this post! A mothers work is NEVER done!.....arrgh..... On a different note I like Gus for your new pup or Levi or how about Peanut??

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  27. I am completely, utterly with you! I work full time as a teacher (and they continue to pile so much on us every year which is ridiculous!) and when I come home at 5, I am exhausted...all Kate wants to do is play with me and I really want to, yet as soon as those sweatpants come on, I am truly done...plus wanting to keep a clean and organized house adds to the "Mommy has so much to do." I have to remind myself DAILY that each day is a blessing and you need to make the most of it...it is even written on my bedroom mirror. When I get stressed, I think of my neighbor who is also 38 and recently diagnosed with incurable brain cancer. She told me she would do anything to feel "normal people" stress vs. the stress of leaving behind her two young children. That REALLY hit home with me. I think of her when I "freak out" because I am not doing it all like I think I should in my mind. Guess we all need that reminder...I truly believe EVERY mother feels this way!

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  28. I completely understand. Last week I was wondering if we were going to ever sell our home since the showings seemed to have stopped. This week I find out I am moving in 10 days!!! On Thanksgiving morning we will start the 3 day drive to Houston. My kids thought we would have one last holiday in this house and I had to disappoint them. My next 10 days are so busy I told my son I could not watch my grandson. I, then called him back and changed my mind. I would rather be a little less organized and have a day with my grandson. Your kids know you love them, I can see it their eyes. No mother ever feels she is doing enough. Find peace in the little moments, be happy that he wants to spend time with you and is comfortable saying so. From where I sit (surrounded by boxes) you are balancing just fine.

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  29. Don't be so hard on yourself. You are probably going to have to just let a few things go. Your children are all at the ages where they need lots of your time for all of their activities. In a few years you'll find you have a little extra time after school because they will be more independent with homework. As they get older the opportunities to help at school are more limited. I love doing lunch duty now but when I was doing it for 3 schools it really put a dent in my day.

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  30. Oh yes ma'am, you are speaking my language here!!! Paige told me the same thing about a week ago, so I cancelled all of my photoshoots and any other "extras" and we've been hanging out and having a blast! I am NOT going to get stressed over the holidays (I'll keep saying that until I believe it :)
    We took our Christmas card photo yesterday and you know what, it's nothing special, but that's ok. I just want friends to know that we love them, not to show off my photog skills, like I usually aim to do. Less is best, right? RIGHT? See, I'm just trying to talk to myself here :) Love ya, Kim! You are an incredible mommy. Hang in there...we all feel that way! Hugs!

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  31. I am sorry your feeling behind. I know the feeling well. I really like the motto, I need to repeat it to myself! Hope you get caught up quickly and you feel back on track.

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  32. Kim,
    One of my BFs - Jamie always says "let go, let God". She's crazy busy like you, and it helps...
    xoxo
    Mich

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  33. I attempted Christmas card pictures too! Mine were terrible. On to plan B. I don't know what that is just yet though! Good luck getting back on track! It is hard sometimes!

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  34. Kim, I would take your "B" or "C" Game ANY day of the week! I do not know how you do it all!

    Congratulations on your new dog! He is a cutie!! How about Scout and "Buddy"??

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  35. I completely feel your pain! I am in such a funk right now. This parenting gig is soooo hard! Hang in there!

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  36. I have to admit I like things to be tidy, clean etc - it just makes me feel better. But at some point there really is not enough time...I would suggest not doing another photo shoot and making a fun, less formal Christmas card with what you already have. Possibly write a list and cross off whateer does not have to be done and maybe you will feel less overwelmed and have more time to snuggle up with the kids and read and just have fun. Taking a walk with or without the family always makes me feel invigorated and possibly closer to God because you can look around and be thankful for everythign he created and that you love.

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  37. As for the new family member - Skip or Skipper.

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  38. I love your blog, but blogging can wait! Take care of yourself first!

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  39. I totally feel your pain Kim. I have not been on my "A game" for months. First it was preparing for China and now it is recovering from China. The timing is not the best with the holiday approaching fast and furiously, but I will muddle through I am sure.

    I just saw the pictures of the new member of your family.... HOW CUTE!! Did y'all come up with a name yet?

    And I am sure you got a cute picture to use for your Christmas Card this year..... you always do! We are going to attempt this weekend.....I'm nervous this year with Reagan in the mix. We'll see!

    Have a great day~

    xoxo,

    Lisa

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  40. Don't you love it when the kids know what you are trying to do and know how to not do what you want them to do? Overall though a very clear and cute picture!
    Yes, I understand the feeling of overwhelmed; working full time, plus being an older parent (empty nesters no more with a four year old), plus the economy has altered most of our financial plans, so many things to bring us down. But looking into the eyes of children is such a blessing and when she tugs at my pant leg, I just sink to the floor and get down on her level.
    Your dog? Looks alot like our past dog, named Salty Dog!

    Alyzabeth's Mommy

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  41. By reading your blog and a lot of your comments... I feel I am in very good company! At least I have ordered the Christmas cards... Phew!

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Thank you for your kindness.